Ooooooh what to do....?

Well, after months and months of waiting, the verdict is in.  Of course, I got an answer I didn't predict.  Not a yes, not a no, but a wait. Yep, I'm qualified for the program but spaces have been filled this year so I'm guaranteed a spot for next year. Naturally, I'm bummed that I won't be heading up to Boston and I'm frustrated to begin the planning process again. On the other hand, I have another year to do whatever I please.  Oh, another bit of news, those camps I was excited about required I have my visa by last Friday, but I didn't know that. Also, I realized that if I did go to Boston I wouldn't have enough time at home and then to move up there, so I decided not to do them.  Well, that's what I getting for assuming. The money would be nice and I have plenty of time to do them and come home, but I know the camps are over staffed and begging to work there now seems rude.  So, I'll be home at the end of June unless I decide to go on vacation with my host family in early July.  I haven't been home for the 4th of July in a couple years, so I'll probably come on home.  Also, I think Mamma and Daddy have decided instead of seeing Europe, they'd rather check out a Caribbean island or something that doesn't require us to be at the mercy of the Icelandic volcano. I totally support this plan, I've seen plenty of Europe for now and I'm hoping that the ash doesn't delay my flight home. So, who knows what will happen next year. The best laid plans of mice and men, eh?  I've applied to some social work jobs and I've got a long list of possibilities, but I'm not going to get my hopes super high for any one thing.  I'll just throw out several lines and see if anything bites.  If not, Daddy says I can work out at the feed and seed store : )

Aside from my confused feelings and anxious pursuit of a new plan, I'm having a nice time in Germany still.  The end of April was a busy time for my host parents because they've had big exams to grade so I've watched Piet a lot, but still found time to run and meet up with my buddies.  Two weekends ago the weather was perfectly lovely so Saturday Elisa and I rode our bicycles to Bad Zwischenahn and ate brownies while we watched the sail boats float atop the gorgeous lake there.  That evening I joined my host family at a local talent show of sorts where my host mom danced and she, Piet and Jorn performed "The Lion Sleeps Tonight." Piet seemed a little confused during the song, but did really well in front of the crowd.  Sunday was also lovely and Piet's grandparents came to visit, so after a huge lunch, I snuck out and laid (lied? I'll have to ask Cord later) out in the sun in the cute park in my neighborhood.  I don't think I brag on this little spot enough.  It's just a couple minutes away from the house and it's super cute.  There's a small pond where ducks frolic and a winding path serves as a perfect location for Piet and me to pretend that we're in an enchanted forest where witches give us maps, but not always correct maps, of course.  Anyway, on this particular Sunday Daniele and Yvonne joined me on a small hill to soak in the sun our skin has been missing for the past months.  Relaxed and fabulous weekend.

Last week was the normal schedule of watching Piet and cleaning veggies, with one lovely exception.  Elisa invited me to join her at a theater workshop in Oldenburg that was surprisingly conducted in English.  First off, the group met in an old Naval Academy that seemed abandoned.  Large lawns sported grass which was much too high for the meticulous lawn care that is standard in Germany while the retired airplanes aimed to uphold the grandeur the place must have once displayed.  I do have a tendency to romanticize history so I pretended that it was a former location for the Nazi Navy.  Elisa said it wasn't all that old, they just relocated, but that seemed too boring to me.  Ha, we also saw a large rabbit hopping about and when I mentioned that we didn't have rabbits that big in Georgia she quickly responded, "Yeah, because the Dotsons killed them all."  Never has a more accurate portrayal been made : )  When we walked inside the building, we had to meander through weird hallways and rooms to find our group. I think we passed a boat and a statue of a sheep along the way.  We were late, as always, but we jumped right in to the project.  The others had read a newspaper article about a person who had been murdered.  They were then divided into three smaller group so one group portrayed the beginning of the article, while another displayed the middle, and of course the last group wrapped it all up.  I joined the first group and had the rare advantage of being the only native English speaker, so it was a little easier for me to blab about my ideas than the others, but still, I was creatively on fire.  I guess I was just in a good mood that day (I read Fried Green Tomatoes last week and I felt like I'd taken a trip home) but I came up with several ideas for our group and helped connect each group's work when we combined our pieces. Because the article didn't reveal who had committed the murder, we decided to start the piece with two kids playing outside with guns until one (me) accidentally shoots a girl through her open window.  We used a red umbrella to symbolize the blood and the dead girl carries it around the room (no stage) and shows the blood dripping to another person's apartment and then the skit moves into a dance of a kid trying to clean the blood. The other kid and I stood at the window and watched as it all happens until finally the girl we'd killed comes over and hands the umbrella to us, trying to show that we've now got blood on our hands. Creepy, huh?  The whole thing was created in just over an hour and we even had an audience!  It had been so long since I'd been given the chance to think creatively in a group and I simply relished in the experience.  If I can ever figure out a way to combine my passion for theater and my love of social work, I'll be one happy gal.

Alright, so I haven't even started on the most exciting part of the past week...Berlin!!  I met two buddies in Bremen on Friday and we preceded to drive to Berlin. Now, I know my grandmother will shake her head at this, but we used a website to carpool with strangers who were also going to Berlin and only charged us 20 euro to ride with them.  Considering the insane prices of trains, it's a lovely system and probably only works in Germany where people see it as a practical way to save gas and money rather than a way to rob or kill people.  We rode with a Turkish man and his wife who were quite nice and remained so even in over an hour of traffic.  Turns out, May 1st is a holiday in Europe which sorta compares to our labor day, so everybody and their brother was on the autobahn, but we made it alright.  Unfortunately I was a little late to the the She and Him concert, but I still heard most of their set. I must say, Zooey Deschanel sings better in concert than in a studio.  We waited by her tour bus after the show to see if we could meet her, but instead we were just bothered by a drunk man who insisted that he's the new James Bond.  After the show, Julie and I joined some fellow Americans to a tasty Mexican restaurant and then to a pretentious bar where they insisted we buy a drink or leave.  I got a weird look for ordering banana juice, but it's a new obsession of mine.  After that I was tired from a long day of driving so we went to our friend Chelsey's apartment and got some sleep.

Saturday we walked around for a while and saw the Olympic stadium and a church that was bombed during the war, but not rebuilt so it would stand as a reminder of the past. Apparently that church doesn't signify the need for peace to everyone, because May 1st serves as a holiday of protests in most German cities. It seems that some haven't got the memo that Nazism is, like, so last century and they're still protesting for their rights as a political party.  I guess it's just like the idiot neo Nazi skin heads that cause a fuss in America, but these are more organized. Luckily, there are many more people who think that these people are dumb dumbs, so they protest against them. The scariest bit is the police force that marches around the city in full body protection, there to control the crowds.  The protesters usually wait until dark to get their craziness going, so we were out of the area well before that.  I suppose it's cool that there's a specific day for everybody to get out and speak their mind, but it's still strange to me that everyone marks their calendars to protest, does it, and then goes home.  I don't understand what gets accomplished. Maybe a German will explain it better and I can relate it to you.  But now, I'm perplexed.

{Since I first posted this, my buddy Arne informed me that the protests are not as popular as they once were, but they are a way for people to argue against the far right politics (near Nazism) which is "mainly a problem of Eastern Germany, where in some villages right wingers get like 20% of the votes."  He writes, "It's not as organized as you suppose. There are many different groups that only team up on such occasions (another is the day of the Bombardment of Dresden)." Wikipedia says that was a day  the U.S. and Britain bombed a town that Germany argues didn't have much Nazi significance and shouldn't have been touched. Alright, history lesson is done.}

After we left the festival area, Julie and I joined Chelsey at her place and we rested.  We all debated whether or not we could be bothered to get dolled up and go out, but we found energy and managed to meet up with my buddy Jonas from Bremen and his friend Arne.  The night proved to be the first in a long time that I had non stop fun.  We just went to one place, but it was everything a dance club should be.  Not too big or too crowded, didn't smell like smoke, music was great for dancing, and there was karaoke downstairs! After we heard an "interesting" rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody and an impressive version of a song from Phantom of the Opera, we assumed our American obligation of singing Journey.  After camp, "Don't Stop Believing" has become one of my all time happy songs, so I had a blast.  We danced and sang to our hearts' content,  and made it safely back home and slept oh so well.

Sunday we slept in and made ourselves a delightfully American breakfast of pancakes, bacon, and scrambled eggs. The rest of our time together was spent relating our lives as au pairs and chatting about the ambiguous future we're all approaching as our days in Germany come to an end.  Before I knew it, it was time for me to gather my things and head to a gas station where I'd meet my next team of car-poolers. I was a little nervous about finding the meeting spot alone, and this time I couldn't travel with any of my friends, but to my relief, the place was easy to find and the driver and the two other guys riding with us were super pleasant.  I enjoyed witty banter all the way home, so the 4 hour ride didn't feel long at all.  Good ole Jorn met me at the train station in Bad Z and I was home safely around 11.

This week I've just been trying to come to terms with the fact that I may be staying on my parents' couch for longer than I expected, but I'm happy to have time to enjoy the things I've missed so dearly.  Trips to Chattanooga, singing loud songs on car rides with Tad and Kelsey, riding my horse (if he remembers how), running the two mile loop, meeting little Finley, Sunday lunches at Maw Maw's, all so wonderful.  So, get ready to have me back soon and let me know if a dream job for a social work loving girl comes up.  Miss ya, but I'll see you soon : )